{"product_id":"not-a-proctologist-tee","title":"Not A Proctologist Tee","description":"\u003ch3 data-start=\"162\" data-end=\"195\"\u003e🦆 “Not a Proctologist” Tee\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCOMFORT COLORS TEES!\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"196\" data-end=\"263\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"196\" data-end=\"263\"\u003e“I’m not a proctologist… but I know an asshole when I see one.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"265\" data-end=\"477\"\u003eThis one’s for the brutally honest and unapologetically funny. Featuring a sassy duck rocking shades and sipping iced coffee, this tee says exactly what everyone else is thinking — with a little extra attitude.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"479\" data-end=\"493\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"479\" data-end=\"491\"\u003eDetails:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"494\" data-end=\"853\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"494\" data-end=\"564\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"496\" data-end=\"564\"\u003e💖 \u003cstrong data-start=\"499\" data-end=\"516\"\u003eSoft \u0026amp; Comfy:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium cotton blend with that broken-in feel\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"565\" data-end=\"623\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"567\" data-end=\"623\"\u003e😎 \u003cstrong data-start=\"570\" data-end=\"585\"\u003eUnisex Fit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfectly relaxed for any body type\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"624\" data-end=\"706\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"626\" data-end=\"706\"\u003e🎨 \u003cstrong data-start=\"629\" data-end=\"647\"\u003eVibrant Print:\u003c\/strong\u003e Bold, fade-resistant colors that hold up to your sarcasm\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"707\" data-end=\"775\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"709\" data-end=\"775\"\u003e🧵 \u003cstrong data-start=\"712\" data-end=\"722\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Bright pink — because confidence looks good on you\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"776\" data-end=\"853\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"778\" data-end=\"853\"\u003e🦆 \u003cstrong data-start=\"781\" data-end=\"797\"\u003eDesigned by:\u003c\/strong\u003e Luckless Apparel — for those who don’t sugarcoat life\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"855\" data-end=\"873\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"855\" data-end=\"871\"\u003ePerfect For:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"874\" data-end=\"1039\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"874\" data-end=\"930\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"876\" data-end=\"930\"\u003eCoffee runs, lazy Sundays, and calling out bad vibes\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"931\" data-end=\"992\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"933\" data-end=\"992\"\u003eGifting to your sassiest friend (or keeping for yourself)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"993\" data-end=\"1039\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"995\" data-end=\"1039\"\u003eAnyone who believes honesty is an art form\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1041\" data-end=\"1085\"\u003eSpeak your truth — one duck at a time. ☕🖕\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Luckless Outfitters","offers":[{"title":"Small","offer_id":46984819212466,"sku":"C1717-Crunchberry-SM-Proctologist","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Medium","offer_id":46984819245234,"sku":"C1717-Crunchberry-MD-Proctologist","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Large","offer_id":46984819278002,"sku":"C1717-Crunchberry-LG-Proctologist","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"XL","offer_id":46984819310770,"sku":"C1717-Crunchberry-XL-Proctologist","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":46984819343538,"sku":"C1717-Crunchberry-2X-Proctologist","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":46984819376306,"sku":"C1717-Crunchberry-3X-Proctologist","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0711\/3342\/9938\/files\/PhotoOct162025_15330PM.jpg?v=1768673779","url":"https:\/\/muricatees.com\/products\/not-a-proctologist-tee","provider":"Muricatees.com","version":"1.0","type":"link"}